I was just wondering if true happiness actually exists.

I mean, most or rather, much or all of the happiness I feel now in normal daily life just evaporates after a while. It could be caused by a sugar or caffeine rush, and then that makes me go 'high' combined with some very excitable friends, but after a while ti just slips away.

Everything will just slide back into it's original place, where I languish in my little world, filled with darkness...

Everything else in life which I had momentarily forgotten just slips back into my mind, and I am once again reminded of the many imperfect things in life, and all the worries and troubles and things I want to do but can't, and the things I have to do but I don't want to.

Heck, is there such a thing as true happiness anyway? All those people who are perpetually optimistic, and seemingly Little Miss Sunshine, sooner or later their 'sunshine quotient' will run out...Right?

Sooner or later I wonder if I will ever get the meaning of life, and all. Why I'm even existing on this earth.

All the happiness is so momentary, fleeting, and just a thing of the moment, which might be only for a few minutes. I wonder if there's a way, some kind of alchemical potion to stay happy forever.

I wonder.

Heck.