Just need an R and a K to make quark. A quark is a sub-atomic particle, like protons or neutrons. A quark is what I am. Quirky and eccentric and tiny.

So tiny that I'm constantly blocked by people in the front. Stupid big heads. =.=

HAHAHAHAHAH.

I want to go back to Yunnan!

It's cold.

The kids are adorable.

I like speaking in Chinese there.

Then maybe my Chinese will improve.

Due to the really strict high school PE standards I will finally lose all the stupid fat and be...

FINALLY IN SHAPE.

I like the food.

I like the people.

The streets look good for photo opportunities.

Okay never mind I'm not good at taking photos.

But I like it there.

And it's so simple.

And the people are nice.

And the people are friendly.

Maybe it's because I went as a tourist.

Sigh.

I don't really want to stay here but I don't really want to go anywhere.

'Prom''s coming up.

'Prom' is actually Founder's Day Dinner - compulsory for Sec 4s.

Most people are treating it as prom and getting pretty dresses.

I was discussing it with Winnie yesterday.

She wants to design her own dress.

We were looking through Sarah Dahlberg's McQueen mag.

She likes this white dress with two straps, but both on one shoulder, and a floaty slightly... ripped-effect skirt.

The only things I liked were from the men's section.

Then I realised I was fat and ugly and short

and not tall and slim and hot like the models.

So it wouldn't work on me.

I'd love to go in slacks and a blazer.

But I don't have them.

And I think that my mother would never let me go in that.

She'd force me into a dress.

But I hate dresses. And I hate being girly. I hate being a girl.

There I said what's been on my mind

ever since almost all of recent forever.

I would love to be male.

Guys just exude this sense of coolness.

Girls are so helpless, so weak.

So I-don't-know-how-to-say-it.

Aiyah just take it that I hate being a girl.

Major PMS.

Girls are so complicated.

I don't want to be one of them.

Guys are more practical.

And somehow most of them just turn out skinny.

Maybe they move more.

And they're also taller - 160 at least.

I'm a freaking midget at 148.

What's the use of reading all the books if no one's there to discuss them

No sense of satisfaction

Orget-fay it-way

Uck-fay ife-lay

Hahah Pig Latin.

At this point...

I realise that this is reading like a freaking sob story.

Aiyah-way.

Interpret-way it-way our-yay own-way ay-way.